Week 5, Day 3

The only way out is through...

This week I feel like I've been on an emotional roller coaster with extremes in either direction from one hour to the next. As much as it sucks, I think it is all part of progress and simply means that changes are happening, my energy is realigning and everything is going to be okay. I of course know that everything is always going to be okay, but that isn't always enough comfort to make yourself feel better. Recently I've found some comfort in knowing thinking that everything is in God's hands and there is no reason to have anxiety. This too, doesn't always make everything feel okay. We are humans, and humans are highly emotional brings. Granted, I know some people that seem to have way less emotions and some that have way more, but overall, you get the idea. I don't know exactly where I want to go with this entry, but I feel sort of exhausted and tired. I just feel warn out, partially from thinking too much.

MORNING PAGES!!

I've noticed the depth of my pages have really increased. In the beginning I was basically rambling about the errands of the day, little things that happened or didn't happen. My thoughts were all of the place. Now, I find myself writing about the same topic the entire 3 pages and in controlled legible print. Yesterday I wrote about an experience I had in the lunch room in 5th grade. It was a very random memory, but I could remember every detail, even what I was eating. I love that I'm going places with my writing, below just the surface of a list of the events of the day. I'm excited to see what I'll be writing tomorrow morning.




Every time you raise your voice
I see the greener grass
Every time you run for cover
I see this pasture
Every time we're in a funk
I picture a different choice
Every time we're in a rut
This distant grandeur

My tendency to want to do away feels natural and
My urgency to dream of softer places feels understandable

The only way out is through
The faster we're in the better
The only way out is through ultimately
The only way out is through
The only way we'll feel better
The only way out is through ultimately

Every time I'm confused
I think there must be easier ways
Every time our horns are locked I'm towel throwing
Every time we're at a loss, we've bolted from difficulty
Anytime we're in stalemate of final bowing

My tendency to want to hide away feels easier and
The immediacy is picturing another place comforting to go

The only way out is through
The faster we're in the better
The only way out is through ultimately
The only way out is through
The only way we'll feel better
The only way out is through ultimately

We could just walk away and hide our heads in the sand
We could just call it quits, only to start all over again
With somebody else

Every time we're stuck in struggle, I'm down for the count that day
Every time I dream of quick fix I'm assuaged
Now I know it's hard when it's through
And I'm damned if I don't know quick fix way
But formerly mistreat me silence now outdated

My tendency to want to run feels unnatural now
The urgency to want to give to you I don't want most feels good

The only way out is through
The faster we're in the better
The only way out is through ultimately
The only way out is through
The only way we'll feel better
The only way out is through ultimately

The only way out is through
The faster we're in the better
The only way out is through ultimately
The only way out is through
The only way we'll get better
The only way out is through ultimately